Sunday, December 9, 2018

Review Guide

Are you tired of looking at reviews and seeing, “The food was great,” and asking the reviewer in your head, “What food was great?” How about seeing someone completely skip the entire meal and tell you why the lack of being brought their food in a timely manner led a 1-Star review?

Well personally, I never read the reviews, and for just these reasons. I usually have to scour the entire length of the reviews written to find one solid review. Even then, I don’t know who this person is writing it, so how can I be sure they have the same pallet I do when it comes to certain foods? I don’t want to read a review on a burger joint and the reviewer eats McDonalds 2-3 times a week. You might be thinking, “Hey! I eat McDonalds and I know good food.” Well, you might think you do, but how can you be sure? Before you judge me, let me explain. Growing up my family didn’t have much money, so we consumed a lot of canned goods and processed foods. Every Thanksgiving we had canned cranberries, and it was literally my absolute favorite. Well one year we actually had real cranberries, and it was disgusting, or so I thought. How could that be you’re wondering? Well, I became accustomed to certain food tasting a certain way. When something else didn’t mimic that particular taste, it wasn’t received the same way. After some time I learned to love real cranberries, and in turn you may already have guessed it, the canned stuff just wasn’t appealing anymore.

What does this all mean and what am I trying to say you’re thinking? The reviews you will be reading will not only cover over 40+ points of the entire adventure of going to a new restaurant; from the very first thought of being hungry, to how available parking was, all the way through to how we felt when we got home after eating, but they will also give you a brief background of the critics preferred palette. This is to say, I know what a good clam tastes like, but I don’t like clams one bit. Taking that into consideration I won’t say a place has bad clams when I personally just don’t like clams. No more bias, no more un-objective analysis’s of food. Sometimes the food is slow because it’s 8pm on a Friday night and for some odd reason this place is seeing a crowd they just haven’t seen before. Sometimes that leads to a waiter or waitress forgetting the steak knife you asked for. It’s not the end of the world, so instead of reading a paragraph on not getting a utensil, we’ll take that into consideration and still give you the proper critique.

Our focus here at T.R.A.P. CHICAGO™ is first and foremost geo-politics, but we need to eat too, so give us a little bit of time to bring you a nice list of properly critiqued and reviewed places to eat and or have a drink at. We assure you, it will be well worth the wait, just like some of the places we may suggest for you.

If you like what you see and are looking to be reviewed by a publication who’s going to give you more than a twitter posts worth of words in their critique, then check out the “Contact Us” page and send us a message. We will be sure to get back to you at our absolute earliest convenience.

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